Don’t let arthritis change relationships
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Arthritis brings in much more than just pain. It changes the way a family lives and reacts. There is sadness, frustration and helplessness. There are also moments of anger. What’s most difficult to comprehend is the way relationships are redefined as families refuse to cope with new realities. It is important that each ember of the family readjusts himself or herself to the changed reality, if this family is to laugh again.
The first is the spouse. There is no need to feel limited on account of limitations in sex life caused by pain. You must remember that your spouse is the same who has given you so much joy and happiness. Now it is for you to find ways to keep the flame going. You can rework postures, and share moments of fun after your spouse has taken pain killers. Most important the disease does not stop you from sharing moments of intimacy.
If you are a teenager, you may find it difficult to handle your arthritis-afflicted parent as you’re going through physical as well as emotional changes. There may be phases of anger, frustration, fear and even sadness. But what is important is to express these feelings without being misunderstood. Instead of saying unwanted things in an unwanted manner, you can always lean upon your school counselor or teacher to guide you. Being patient with your parent will help both you and your parent lead a happy life.
To make things work better, each member can take up a task, or be assigned a job to be done. It may include the teenage son to collect the garbage and mow the lawn or the teenage daughter to wash and fold clothes. In this case, the family should work as a team and work out a chart of household chores to give maximum care to the member.
It’s only in difficult times that true love is ready to weather all storms. Short-term plans like picnics and short trips along with back-up plans can help the disabled member stay happy. Being able to make changes in plans is the key. Slight changes in the family routines can ensure active participation and enjoyment of each and every member in the family.
Also, talking freely helps bring up issues that could otherwise become bigger and harder to solve. One has to be a good listener. When there is a two-way talk, it is extremely important to understand the feelings of the person at the other end.
These thoughtful steps may not lessen your parent’s pain but they will surely give him strength to cope with it. He will be ready to face anything without fear, if he knows the family is by his side.
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